At Journey’s End
On our last day on this beautiful, life changing journey, 6:00 AM saw us up and ready for a new day. After cleaning our bunk house, we set out for our final day at the school. Due to the three hour drive home and a quick adventure planned in Glacier Park in the afternoon, our day with the students would end after 10:30 mass. Before school began, the students gathered in the gym for some pick-up basketball. Although my percentage of shots made was less then pretty much every single fourth grader there (probably on the entire reservation), I had a blast challenging many of the kids I had formed relationships with throughout the week. After the morning assembly, I followed the fourth-graders to their class room. As I sat off to the side, watching Ms. Stack teach her kids, I was struck by just how much love filled the class. The love Ms. Stack showed her students was evident in every “good job!”, and hug; even in her reprimands. The students love for her shined through in every proud accomplishment presented to her and in every smile shown. And my love for those kids had blossomed from simply a love of kids in general, to individual relationships of love and respect. More than anything, these kids have taught me that in the face of every difficulty and hardship there is a resilience to be found. In the end it came down to perspective. We could choose to see the Blackfeet as a nation in need of help. A nation full of sadness and despair with little hope for a better future. Or we can choose to see it through the eyes of each bright child, still full of dreams and plans for the future. Or through the eyes of Ms. Stack, who saw endless potential in each smile of a student. This short week left all of us with a whirlwind of emotions each of us need time to process through. But one thing is certain, the love we found in our hearts for a beautiful people will continue to grow despite the distance that separates our lives. Our lives have changed all because of one week on a tiny reservation in Browning, Montana.
With Love,
Kaycee Brustkern
Our Time is Running Short
The third day at De La Salle, the last full day of our trip, proved to be climatic for many in our group. Relationships were developing and depth was being reached. Whether Kevin was introducing his 5th grade class to the Sound of Silence or others were learning the rich and fascinating history of the Blackfeet Nation, this Wednesday afternoon proved to be more fulfilling than most weeks in my life.
There seemed to be a shared feeling of guilt and responsibility in the group. We discussed how hard it is to start such wonderful relationships and leave right away. While many of the people we have met are rich in wisdom and in love, their suffrage has embedded itself in our consciousness. As one of the group members put, ‘How is it that I am blessed so much and have done nothing yet this wonderful community has done nothing and has to suffer?’ It is hard for all of us but the conclusion was made that change in heart can be a painful experience, but the development through love makes it worth it.
Cody during Marty Martain Talk, Browning MT
The evening was another amazing experience as we were privileged to engage in conversation with Marty Martain as he explained to us Blackfeet history. We learned of the 30-year period where the reservation shrunk from much of Montana, Northern Idaho, and Canada, to roughly 1/50th its original size. We learned of the significance of the earth and all things, but what was most overwhelming was listening to Marty tell us about the significance of the eagle. He told us the eagle is the most sacred animal, how the eagle is a carrier between the creator and us. We got the rare opportunity to even touch, hold and wear 1800’s eagle feather regalia. It was humbling, and simply awe-inspiring experience.
For myself the most influential experience was with the children, having them open up to me about their family, their struggles, and most of all their immense capacity to love. As I recollect on the week, that has been what I have been able to take away most. These kids have been able to teach us love.
Cody Noffsinger
A Trip to Medicine Bear and Beyond
Today was another really eventful day. We began the day by getting up and arriving at De La Salle Blackfeet School at around 7:40 am. We had time to just hang out with the kids in the morning. It was amazing to just see how full of energy and excitement the kids were to be playing around with their friends before school.
Around 9:30 am we left the school and walked over to Medicine Bear. Medicine Bear is a soup kitchen type of home for the Street People. The Street People are not homeless, but rather are people that have a place to live but have been kicked out of it. These people are some of the happiest people that I have ever seen. From the moment that they entered into the Medicine Bear to the minute they left, they were smiling and laughing. They are a huge family that must stick together. While we were there, I really saw Christ in these people. Because of their joy and happiness about everything. Even though they are not the most well off, they are ok with it and are just trying to be the best that they can be.
Medicine Bear Kitchen, Browning MT
There was one man that a few of us got to listen to talk for a long time. He was a decorated member of the marines. He was medically discharged because he was shot in the leg. He was one of the nicest gentlemen that I have talked to. The part that struck me most about the conversation that we had with him was when he talked about his drinking. We have all known about the drinking challenges here on the reservation, but to hear about it from a specific person was really amazing. The gentleman kept saying that he knew that it was bad for his health and bad for his personality; however, the reason he kept drinking was to make himself feel better about the person that he is. He does not use drinking to just get drunk but to feel better. Which he believes is different for many of the other drinkers in the community.
There was another man there that was also a retired member of the military. He said that the reason that he drinks is because when he is sober, he has dreams of the war and nightmares of things that happened. During our evening reflection, Cody said that the gentleman that a few of us listen to really gave a good reason for the drinking in the community and on the reservation. Many Indians enter the army and love serving the United States; however, it is hard for them to come back and be the same. This can be said for many of the soldiers that are not Indian or from the reservations.
Later that afternoon we had the pleasure of listening to a man named Harry Barnes. Harry lives in Browning and is a Blackfeet from his mother and Irish from his Dad. He was born in Spokane, WA. He has moved back and forth from off the reservation to on it for years. He now owns his own business in Browning. Because of this, he knows a lot about the economics of the Blackfeet reservation. This was a big eye opener for us. We had heard about the hardships that the people are having to go through, but to hear about it from a person who lives it each day was amazing. He talked about the different big economic advances for the reservation, from the horse to the coming of the whiskey traders. He also talked about the tribal government. Just like the United States government, the tribal government is unable to make decisions and are fighting and may possible shut down like ours did. Because of this, they are unable to pay certain people what they need to be paid. For Harry, his business does a lot of business with the government, but if they are not cooperating, then they can’t spend money and therefore he has lost business. This then effects how much he can pay his employees. Which then affects his employees’ way of life.
Today was a very important day in our immersion in Browning. We really got a glimpse into the life that we had only heard about. Being able to spend time with the Street People and then to listen to Harry really put into perspective the lives of the people here in Browning. During reflection that night we talked about what is that God is calling us to do. So, as we continue throughout this week, it is important that we start looking for what it is that He is calling us to get out of this immersion and what it is that we can do when we return to Helena.
Alex Chopyak
Our First Day at School
Kevin Tutoring Students, De La Salle School, Browning MT
Today was our first day of “real” service. After an early morning, we showed up at De La Salle School at 8:00 AM, where we stayed until 4:30 in the afternoon, spending time in classrooms tutoring and getting to know students. Like all of us, I was unsure of what to expect out of the school and the students. My experiences throughout the day were very eye opening.
Having heard about the many social challenges in Browning, I was surprised to see how much the fifth grade classroom I was in was like any other fifth grade classroom I knew. What I found uncommon about the class was the evident love between the teacher and the students. Like any other group of ten year olds, there were some behavioral problems. We all agreed that the way discipline is handled at the school reflects a true love and community between teachers and students. Even when students were reprimanded, they showed a respect for the teachers and seemed to genuinely understand why they were in trouble. Reflecting on this, we agreed that the ability to discipline someone in order to help him or her be the best they can be is a necessary part of true selfless love. This unique classroom environment exemplifies the deep sense of caring and community in Browning.
After spending several hours in the classroom with students, we headed to lunch in the basement of Little Flower Parish, which is located next door to the school. Here I received a serious reality check. As I walked to the church I saw a shiny white hearse parked in front, and people entering the church. We had been told the previous day about the staggering number of funerals held at that parish, and the disturbing fact that many of these funerals were for young people. Eating lunch in the basement while a funeral service took place above us made this reality clear. It was humbling to look around and see these very normal, apparently innocent children going nonchalantly about their lives in an environment that makes innocence almost impossible to hold on to. As I reflected on all of the blessings I take for granted, which many of these students may never experience the words of Christ, “Without cost you have received; without cost you are to give” (Matthew 10:8) became very real to me. This experience really pushed me to give of myself in service this week and to make service a more serious part of my life as I return to Carroll.
At the end of the day, we watched a very powerful film called Smoke Signals, which chronicles a young Coeur d’Alene Indian’s efforts to make sense of his identity in the wake of his father’s death. Having spent the day serving in a place where such realties are not uncommon, the film really hit home. Overall, today was a day of moving experiences, which left me, excited to see how we will encounter Christ in the remainder of this trip.
Kevin McNamee
Moving Forward
On the Buffalo Jump, Browning, MT
A cold Sunday morning at 6:45 AM six brave souls braved the snowstorm to head north to Browning Montana. We loaded up the cars and headed into Borromeo dorm for a quick prayer to start our headlights trip. Well we drove, the roads were ok, some parts were bad, but the best part was the views, rolling hills, mountains painted purple by the sunrise. It was pretty neat. A reoccurring theme in our drive was circles. Dan loves circles; well that’s what I deduced by our drive up. In Choteau, we circled the round about two times for good measure. Into the wrong drive way while trying to find where we are staying, another circle. Even trying to find a place to hike! As much as I joke about Dan’s love of circles, we gleamed some really cool spiritual insights from it. Even though we were moving towards our goal, sometimes we would get stuck going in circles at a roundabout, or make a wrong turn and have to backtrack onto the right path, often in our spiritual life we do the same. Get hung up, or go down the wrong path. I really liked this thought at the end of the day. So we finally arrive and are shown our cabin.
After the usual claiming of a bunk and getting settled in, we decided to go hike up a buffalo jump nearby. So we hopped into the cars and headed down the road, passed where we need to stop and drive in a circle again. We hiked to the base, and in front of us are these beautiful cliffs partly covered in snow. We couldn’t find a definite trail to the top so we decided to forge our own way. It was slippery on the way up and down but man was the view from the top amazing! Rolling hills to the east and to the west, the grandiose view of the Bob Marshall and Glacier national Park. Though these views were awe-inspiring. The little things were just as amazing. Kevin pointed out the way the wind had moved the snow into a pattern reminiscent of sand dunes. Alex commented on frost looking like feathers off of a bush. We saw God in the big things and in the little things today. On the top of the buffalo jump we related how this sacred ground for Native Americans is similar to the sacredness of Mass, and in some sense Christ’s sacrifice.
When we first arrived we attended Mass at the Little Flower Parish, Mass was special because we received a blessing from the congregation. They all turned, laid hands on us and sang, which reminded me of the way Carroll folks bless people. At the buffalo Jump we reflected on the symbol of the buffalo, how it is the way the Blackfeet received life, the buffalo were driven over the cliffs to death. A sacrifice so the Blackfeet Tribe could receive nourishment and life. Like Christ’s sacrifice so we may have eternal life and have the grace to live life to the full here on earth.
Overall today has been a blessing. We got to experience the joy of Mass in a loving community, and see God in his creation. The weather was beautiful and we are all excited to see what God has in store for us!
Peace,
Jared Howes
Our First Day in Browning
Holy Family Mission, Browning MT
We are embarking on yet another journey to one of our favorite places, the Blackfeet Nation. For years now the Headlights program has made an immersion trip to our Diocesan reservation a priority in our ministry, not only because of the challenges that our brothers and sisters face, but also because of the great beauty and wisdom that their culture provides us and the many things they teach us about God and ourselves. We have a tremendous group of students who are excited and open to the possibilities that await us and the wonderful ways that we will encounter God. Please check back and keep up with our adventures and reflections, because we want to share them with you!
Dan Thies
Carroll College Campus Ministry
A Guiding Light
Our week in Browning has concluded and we have all safely returned to Carroll. This week has been full of blessings and graces, and every one of us was able to see Christ in action. In order to put into words what this week has meant to me, I want to talk about a few things that have impacted me the most. They are: stereotypes, prayer and compassion, and the impact of the school.
During one of our group reflections, we were asked to talk about stereotypes involving Native Americans. The common ones came out: distrust of white people, gambling and alcohol problems, and the idea that these kids “hate” school or “can’t do it.” Our experiences would prove otherwise.
The children we worked with were eager to work with us and showed great respect to our group and their teachers. The kids I had the privilege to work with were bright and attentive, and possessed great compassion to learn. One of the most impactful moments came when a mother welcomed us and said: “If there is anything we can do for you, please let us know.” It was incredible to see a mother offer to give us whatever she could, even if she had little herself.
Prayer is a major part of De La Salle. Before school, every class, lunch, and the end of the day involves prayer. The children ask for St. John De La Salle—patron saint of education and St. Catherine Tekakwitha—the first Native American saint—to pray for them. I saw these prayers in action on the playground during recess.
Jace, a 4th grade girl was walking in crying, after being hurt on the playground. Before any of us could attend to her, Benny, a compassionate classmate of hers put his arm around her and tried to comfort her. I truly saw the face of Christ in Benny. He followed Christ’s commandment He instructed to us in John 13:34- “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” It was so inspiring to see their prayers being answered and seeing Christ living through Benny and all of the students.
Last, I want to talk about the impact that De La Salle has on the Browning community. I heard a startling statistic, 40 percent of high school students drop out of Browning High School. However, 99 percent of De La Salle graduates go on to graduate high school. Currently, they have a junior at Stanford University. The first batch of De La Salle Alums just graduated from college and it will be exciting to see their future success.
With great zeal, we should pray for the city of Browning, the students, their families, faculty, and administrators of De La Salle. De La Salle is a guiding light to Browning and Montana, and through this school, hope and a better tomorrow is a reality.
Peace,
Colin Gunstream
A little Humor
Tis the last day of school, and all through town,
The storm has laid snow for cars to whip ‘round.
As we drove to the school, with excitement in our hearts
We were taken agasp as we drove through the wintery darts.
We arrived at the school ready to serve,
But soon there would be to many of nerve.
The weekdays were full with mathematics and works,
But we always had fun with dodge ball and smirks.
The nickname of Snooks was given unanimous poll,
To the smallest of saints her name Nicole.
Asked we were, to be of Facebook friends,
We agreed with happiness because nothing good should ever ends.
The kids became sprightly when 1 p.m. drew near,
We said our goodbyes and said “to a new year.”
Tony Rosales
What It’s Really About
Welcome to Friday
The minute we walked into the school on Monday, I was instantly ready to go! The kids were freshly back from their Christmas break, and excited to have an immersion group with them for the week. From learning about Moses to doing long division, these school days have been a blast. I have loved seeing the look on the seventh graders faces when I say “Good morning!” or when they finally understand a question that they struggled with for so long.
I came to the De La Salle Blackfeet School the fall of my senior year in high school, and I thought that trip was cool…but this one just meant so much more to me. I got to reconnect with some of the kids I worked with last year, as well as getting to know new seventh graders as well. It was Codi and I tacking on the seventh grade, working together with their teachers to help these kids focus, learn, and grow into amazing young people. They all have so much potential, it breaks my heart to know how behind in school they all are and that there’s really not a lot they can do about it besides keep going to school and, hopefully, go on to college. Some of the kids have dreams of coming to Carroll and becoming teachers, which gives me so much happiness and hope for them. But there are also some children who don’t have any dreams or don’t want to share what there are for fear of being made fun of, which is frustrating to me.
Like any middle school students, the kids have those times when they just seem to have ants in their pants! It’s confusing to work to find the balance between being their friend and being a mentor, trying to be approachable and loving but also helping them learn their curriculum. Though, when it comes down to it, the children are here because they or someone who loves them wants them to receive the best schooling possible here. The support systems here are mind-blowing to me- every single member of each family is backing these wonderful young children. It shows me that these bonds are deeper than the snow outside and have more strength than any of the wind.
Alaina Clark
This Is About More…
Another day has gone by here in Browning. I think we would all agree that as the days go on, they seem to move faster and faster. Patrick, Nicole and I have been spending the week with the 6th graders at the school. The sixth graders seem to have a personality all their own. The 6th grade boys are some of the greatest pranksters and goofballs I have ever met. At the same time, each one of them has a sweet personality that could melt anyone’s heart. It didn’t take the 6th graders long to take to having the “immersion students” in the class. Within the first five minutes we were there on Monday, Nicole was granted the nickname Snooki (from Jersey Shore) as the boys believed that she had an obvious pop culture twin.
As the week has progressed we have grown even closer to each one of the students. We follow the sixth graders around from classroom to classroom throughout the day. In most classes we help the students with their work or assist teachers in daily tasks. However, I feel like one of my primary jobs has become answering questions. “How old are you?”, “Are you married?”, “What’s your favorite college football team?”, “Who’s your best friend?” and “Do you have a car?” are just a few of the questions the sixth graders have shot our direction.
Today, Mrs. Moore (the sixth graders homeroom teacher) had us give the students a presentation about ourselves. We shared about where we were from and a few fun stories about Carroll (the students were especially interested in the ghosts of Carroll College). Again, the sixth grade boys enjoyed teasing “Snooki” when she shared her love for Kobe Bryant and Justin Bieber. Patrick was interrogated about his previous career playing high school football and I received the usual teasing about being an OSU and MSU fan.
It amazes me how much the students want to know about our lives and how much they look up to our example. When I realized how much these kids looked up to us, I really began to reflect on the type of role model that I am. I was forced to ponder this question even further when we attended mass with the students today. During his homily, Father Ed challenged the students to shine the light of Christ in all situations, inside the school and out. Father Ed’s homily got me thinking, how do I shine the light of Christ? Do I shine His light in all circumstances? Even the little choices that I make, from laughing at a dirty joke to listening to inappropriate music impacts the light that I shine to His glory. I have resolved this trip to Browning is about a lot more than serving in a school. The Headlights trip to Browning is about uniting different communities in Christ. The uniting of our Carroll Community and the community surrounding the De Le Salle Browning School is more of a journey towards the common understanding, love, and peace of Christ. In the end, this trip has been far more than an opportunity to serve; it has become an opportunity for me to be challenged to reflect upon my own life choices…. How can I better glorify Christ in all that I do?
Tessa Berg
Junior
Carroll College Campus Ministry 